=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= = F.U.C.K. - Fucked Up College Kids - Born Jan. 24th, 1993 - F.U.C.K. = =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= Computer Sniglets ----------------- Variety is the spice of life. So we add humor to the F.U.C.K. files. A new member, Overdriver wrote these the other night and most will be quite familiar with any computer geek out there. Enjoy them and laugh a little. -Dam By: Overdriver -------------- Compucuss - the "colorful metaphors" said at your 'puter keyboard after you realize you just did something you didn't want to do. Entersec - the fraction of a second just before you hit when you make sure in your mind this is what you REALLY want to do. Ttyyppeelexia - when you go to type one character and somehow two get pressed. Gamenonconformant - the ONE game that you can't exit by hitting , , , etc. like 99% of all the other games. Demowait - the period of time that you must wait for the credits to scroll by at the end of a demo. Grungeball - the film and dirt that accumulate on your mouse ball (this effect is applified in Lubbock). 'Puter 'Putz - that annoying person who has a 486/66 and whose major is Home Economics or Political Science. Boardbuzz - the strange feeling you get when you're on a board and you suddenly wonder if the SysOp is watching everything you're doing. Floppyfly - that floppy that gets tossed across the room because chkdsk said it had a few bytes in bad sectors. GUI boundary - when your mouse falls off the edge of your mouse pad. Buffannoyed - when you hit a direction key meaning to move only a few spaces, but you go 20 more than you wanted to because of that damn buffer. Keyboard Blues - wishing that keyboard buffer was just a little larger. Printerfade - when you're printing out your final 20 page paper and your ribbon decides to run out of ink on the last page. Bytebite - when you have 1 byte less on a disk than you need. Switchflash - one of your power center switches that can't decide if it want's to be on or off. PonderWarez - wondering if that file is really worth downloading. Keyboard Condom - the cheap plastic covering that keeps dust off of the keyboard. Three and a half laugh - when you tease your friend because he still doesn't have a 3«" drive. Micro-inch - the amount of extra length you need on your keyboard cord to comfortable sit somewhere else besides right in front of the monitor. Chessy-gif - those gifs whose resolution is a mere 320x200. Blasterclass - the various levels of status one receives determined by what Sound Blaster he owns (i.e. No Blaster, SB, SB Pro, or SB 16). Lock-a-sys - that annoying lock-up that cannot be bypassed by pressing ,, and simultaneously. Gendernojive - when the cable you have is the opposite gender of the one you need. Blasterpop - the sound your SB makes EVERY time you enter or exit a game. Viriibye - when a virus makes interesting things disappear. Fedflam - guys who waste entirely too much time chasing pirates. Bustes Uncontrollables - the intense feeling you have when you seriously think you might actually get caught this time. Vouchbusted - when a person trying to get access to a board uses someones name and then that person in return denounces having any affiliation with the person trying to receive access. BBS hog - that person who has tied up the line to your favorite BBS who you find out (after having logged on 2 hours later) has not uploaded a single file or posted a single message and who you therefor deduce is a leech and must be shot immediately. Hard-drive scan - tediously going through every directory and sub-directory to find those little files you don't need to make room for something you really do. Hard-drive scan regret - wishing you hadn't Hard-drive scanned. Periphenvy - admiring someone else's CD ROM, Tape Back-up, etc. FTP - File Taking Periodically or File Taking Person Clickercount - the number of clicks that your mouse is supposed to be guaranteed to. Cablemosh - the jumble of wires behind your 'puter that appears to be a fire hazard of some sort. Combodip - the virtually endless number of DIP combinations, of which one trys every single combination because he lost the owners manual. VAX Virus - the disease people have who you ALWAYS see when you do a "show user" on the VAX. Bootingnum - a num key L.E.D. that just must come on at boot-up. Drivnesia - forgetting what type your HD is when your CMOS crashes. Cardincrementalism- when one originally decides to spend $100 on a card of some sort and then decides for only $40 more he can get one that's a little better, but ends up paying $180 because if he's going to spend $100 he might as well pay $180 and get a good one, right? 486scheming - sitting around all day thinking about how you could get a 486, not caring if it's ethical or not. P5prick - that asshole who is going to get a P5 the day it comes out. Warezwoes - state of being depressed because you didn't get any new SW today. Illstudylater - when you have a final the next day and instead of studying you are doing something completely unconstructive on your computer. OK - the two letters used most in a two-way chat. Protonogo - when that external protocol just doesn't want to work. Macattack - when, for some strange reason, a person has an urge to use a Macintosh. Joyride - the swirl (or center, push button; move to upper left, push button; move to lower right, push button) which must be done to calibrate your joystick. Papcrunch - the one piece of paper that just won't feed through the printer right. Cabanacongregation- the group of BBSers that can undoubtebly be found at Taco Cabana on Thursday nights, at 10, drinking. Covlexia - when, after installing something, the cover on your 'puter just won't go back on as easily as it came off. Multi-Covlexia - when Covlexia occurs multiple times because the something you just installed didn't work the first few times. x86 fever - a condition when people feel they actually know a lot about 'puters because they know the difference between a 286 and a 386 (I've met some). Powswap - the act of switching power supplies with the hope nothing will fry. IcoulddoitifI wannaettes - people who try to convince you they could program in any language (if they really wanted to). Insertaphobia - the fear when installing a new card (i.e. I might break it, oops static). Generiname - those clones with names like "Missing Byte". Hardtofind - the ongoing and continuous search for more disk space. Keycravas - the space between keys on your keyboard where there is enough space for everything to fall down into, but not enough space for you to get anything out of. Nocrashit - the hope that, after you lock-up a BBS, hanging up will not crash it. dahhquestion - when you enter a command and the program prompts: "Are you sure you want to do this?" Setall - wondering if, without looking, the install program is named "Setup" or "Install". Subinstall - when, after obtaining a new game, you must use Subst to install it. Dirdork - the person, who every time he comes into your room, must do a directory on you computer to make sure you didn't get anything new and not tell him. Nointrophobe - a person who refuses to watch the intro on any game. Screwbye-bye - when, after disassebling your computer, you can't find one screw when you want to put it back together. Keybang - taking out your aggressions on your keyboard. Optidualtests - the various different speed testers you use on you 'puter in the optimism that you will find one which says it's faster. Digitrash - the accumulation of out-of-date computer parts and accessories others classify as junk, but which to you is treasure. Shockapart - acquiring a certain item simply for its shock value. Rompotporri - the CD which comes with all CD-Rom drives containing a lot of worthless SW. Processjam - the musical CD you listen to 4 out of 5 times you're doing something on your system. Formforgot - formatting a floppy before you did a directory. Extendaslow - when a program will slow down if EMM386 is loaded. Wastetyper - somebody who has nothing else better to do on a weekday than type up a stupid text file such as this one. -OD =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= = Questions, comments, bitches, ideas, etc : z3mar@ttacs.ttu.edu : FUCK = =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= = Official F.U.C.K. Distribution sites and information = = Board Number Other = = ----- ------ ----- = = Immortal Hate 806.745.8879 World HQ = = Ionic Destruction 215.722.0570 Eastern HQ = = PcI 806.794.1438 NUP: ORWELL WAS RIGHT = = Purple Hell 806.791.0747 Dist. = =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= = Accounts NOT guaranteed on any F.U.C.K. distribution site. If you are = = interested in writing for, or in becoming a distribution site for = = F.U.C.K. call Immortal Hate, and apply for an account, or mail Dam = = at z3mar@ttacs.ttu.edu or on Immortal Hate. Knowledge is power... = =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=